i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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