i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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