Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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