The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
