You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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