I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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