i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
But theres a keg here and me gusta
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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