Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
There's always time for handjobs
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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