How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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