wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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