It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
