PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
