Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
