we're blogging at a bar
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I came so hard my ears popped.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
