So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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