Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
