Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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