She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
