Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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