Pants 0. Shit 1.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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