in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
it's like heaven, but drunker
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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