the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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