can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
