If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
