She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Randomize
