so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I will be naked everywhere
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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