just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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