My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
