Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Do you remember whose house we're in?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
