Sry I called you an 8
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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