is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
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