I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
