i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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