I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
