I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
