why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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