You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
