i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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