They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
