one two three fourrrrnication!
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Green mimosas i think yes
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
