who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize