id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
