Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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