I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
She bit a glass in half.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
