I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
