everyone is single if you try hard enough
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
