I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
