any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
