He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
