Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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